Dear guy who just lost any chance with me,

Why would you compare girls you date to the past girls that you have dated when that didn’t work for a reason? Maybe just maybe, you are using an impossible standard that just sets any psedo-relationship you’ve had up for failure.  Yes, I did talk you into taking a break and coming back to talk about this because I know how much of a mistake you are making—my gay friends tell me so.  However, even after the hiatus if you did come crawling back, you just made your life 10000X harder since now you have so much to make up for.

Sincerely,

Me

P.S. Thanks for wasting so much time.

And the point of that was … ?

Pss.  Also, this grade you gave me says you think I will not succeed in graduate school.  All it does is make me want to kick-ass even more to show you how wrong this vote of “no confidence” is.

Dear Professor,

Okay, you want to give me a grade that would be hard to swing an overall 3.0.  You know not having 3.0s will cause graduate students to leave the program since they can no longer have financial support.  Honestly, besides the project, I have no idea how you can justify such a grade as my performance is not that different from everyone else in the course.  Yes, I will come talk to you today to discuss why my grade is what it is after a night of un-restful sleep from the stress and worry about my fate at the university.  This talk will also likely result in me going to speak to the graduate adviser about how I feel I have been treated in this course and transferring two graduate courses from my undergraduate institution that *should* save me no matter what happens here even without the grade I need to balance this bad grade.

Sincerely,

Me

P.S. I am really curious how you decided to give me this grade when for my project: 1) somebody who is passing didn’t run a simulation and 2) at least 2 other people didn’t finish.  All you have told me is you didn’t like my dynamics.

Happy dance!  What I did was A-ok with my boss. :)

Dear Student,

Yes, I will admit when I graded your lab report incorrectly or didn’t see your answers and regrade the report.  What I will not tolerate is you saying you did the work to take advantage of an extra three weeks to do the work.

Sincerely,

Me

(Now let’s see if I get in trouble with my boss for not letting a student get away with the system.)

You hear a delivery truck outside when waiting for UPS and look outside to see a FedEx truck pulling away.

This student asked me for a letter of recommendation for grad school today…  I haven’t even proven myself in grad school yet.

OkCupid just told me I am hot. Rofl…

I am not sure how this weekend happened…  How I ended up going sailing and all that other jazz.  I am smiling and happy and that is all that is important, right?

I kind of think you are adorable.

Texas,

We need to have a talk…  This Californian is not used to cockroaches.  They are NOT okay.

Sincerely,

Me

Note to self: no more laziness leaving dishes overnight in the sink.

Staying up until 3 am to talk to a guy is not a wise idea…  But hey, I think we have a date on Friday so that is cool.  Well maybe, if he is not a psycho.

I should have bought skull and crossbone earrings.